Barbara’s Unbridled Battle for Beets

“Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves,” (Philippians 2:3 NIV)

The battle over the ownership of a pig was instrumental in the infamous feud between the Hatfield’s and McCoy’s.

It had been since June 2005—eight years—since the last time our family, as a whole, was able to gather together. During that eight year time-span our family had gone through good times and bad…triumphs and tragedies. We had experienced divorce and marriage, military deployment to a war zone and families relocated to new states, with great excitement and anticipation precious life entered this world and with heart-wrenching sorrow life left.

Finishing up lunch, Mom and I were sitting at her familiar forty-five year old dining-room table chatting about the next day’s family gathering to celebrate my parent’s golden anniversary. My daughter, Amber springs into the room grinning from ear to ear cradling three pint-size jars in her arms. Finding the only empty spot on the table she proudly set the three jars down in front of Mom. They were filled to their tops with homegrown homemade pickled beets; glistening like jewels the deep red of garnet. Beaming at me she says, “Here are some of our beets.”

I immediately remembered a facebook conversation I had with Amber several weeks earlier. We “chatted” back and forth about our common taste for pickled beets after she had posted that they had just put up twenty-some jars. Mom and I both looked up at her, practically salivating, and said, “Oh! How wonderful!” My eyes briefly met my mother’s in an uneasy silence.

Later, we began to clear off the table and I was quick to notice Mom as she headed toward her kitchen pantry with all three jars in tow. “Um, Mom? I think those were meant for me, but I will gladly share a jar with you.”

Without a hint of joviality, “Amber set them in front of me,” was Mom’s only reply as she quickly and quietly turned to place them on the shelf and tightly close the door.

Note to self: do not leave without my beets!

The long-awaited party, at the festively decorated home of my sister and brother-in-law, was over all too quickly—an exclusive time of celebration and fellowship with one another. We shared delicious food and fun stories; recalled precious old memories all the while making new ones.

The following morning we were back at Mom’s house and readied ourselves to go in our separate directions. My grandson asked me to fix him a bowl of cereal; I opened the pantry  door and there they were brazenly in plain view...my pickled beets. Mom and I stood in the confines of her kitchen and she called Amber into the room, “We are going to get this beet situation settled,” she said to me, a low tone in her voice.

Amber, wondering why her grandmother was using her “mom” voice joined us in the small one-butt kitchen.  Both Mom and I looked Amber squarely in the eyes as Mom inquired, “Now, Amber, I want you to be completely honest. Who did you mean to give the beets to?”  

Amber sweetly replied, “They were meant to be served with lunch.”  Aghast, Mom and I looked at each other with an almost guilty look of surprise in our eyes. We didn’t want to share the three jars with each other let alone a group of ten. “Oh dear!” I said. I flashed back to those beautiful jars as they sat unsealed and surrounded by lunch foods on the table just a matter of hours earlier—almost felt sorry for the small group who missed out—thought to myself how very sweet.

My other daughter, Meghan, Amber’s twin,  heard the conversation, stepped into the kitchen, boldly chimed in and stated that one of the three jars should go home with her!

Mom and or I are now down to only one jar.

Then, the bombshell. Amber, demurely, let us know she wasn’t talking about the small lunch of ten at Mom’s table she had meant for the beets to be offered to all thirty-four family members at the grand celebration gathering! Mortified, a fleeting notion went through my mind of her thoughtful generosity then Mom blurted out what we were both really thinking, “Are you nuts!”

A humbling and deafening silence…

In an instant Mom’s house was filled with hysterical laughter as the four of us stood in the small kitchen completely amused at ourselves.

In an instant we recognized shameful greed and sincere generosity.

Since it was too late for the party the three jars were happily and gratefully shared among Mom, Meghan and me. (By the way Meghan, you left your jar in the truck…it’s safely sitting here on my kitchen counter!)

Just think of the disgraceful feuds, life-long grudges…even bloodshed, which could have been avoided down through history if they just had the ability to laugh at one’s self and apply what should have been learned as a child…to put others first…and share!

I encourage you to generously share your crop of blessings…even if they are simple pints of pickled beets or pork chops and bacon…with others.